The world is flat.
Well, maybe there’s not a corporate marketing director at a Fortune 500 or an advertising agency that’s ignorant enough to propose something this ignorant. But here’s a list of commonly shared word vomit I’ve heard consistently spewed in marketing meetings over the last 2 years (or more).
Sure, we collected thousands of emails with the social sweepstakes. But you CAN’T PROVE that we gained a single in-store sale from that! It’s the coupons we’ve been posted weekly that are winning for us…post more of that kind of social content.
You’re an idiot. Social Media is known for its ability to generate leads online, which you can – at worst – predict higher revenue by merely assuming the same conversion rate you already have (hopefully you’re optimizing for this as well). And with the reach that you’ll lose from the insta-drop in engagement, coupled nicely with negative sentiment from the overload of coupon irrelevance…forget it, your social sell-sell-sell strategy will do fine.
Conveniently, this retailer also has a massive online store, without a single share icon or product review option to be found. Not a single in-store location has ever mentioned their social presence…much less the insane giveaways, hilarious posts, and free offers that customers and prospects could find there weekly.
The ‘video team’ persistently meets on new things to churn out. But none of them will ever see YouTube, and if they do, it will be uploaded separately on that channel. Why?
Social media is not located on our site. We NEED to keep visitors inside the site!
Not unless you have no social presence, “nofollow” tags at every touchpoint, secret URLs, and zero idea of what a linking strategy is…could this even be possible. People don’t consistently click back and forth between online channels, using multiple devices, and dare I say – use more than one at the same time, do they? Shit! We need to start connecting these experiences. Sigh.
Pinterest is for women…we can’t put our products up there. We’ll look stupid and get no followers.
My favorite kind of idiot. Pinterest is an eCommerce mousetrap, even to the outdoor Navy Seal safety gear retailer that hosts the World Series of Flip-Cup Football. No helmets or pads…just Pinterest – that girly channel that (along with YouTube, SlideShare and Google+) boosts SEO traffic phenomenally.
Plus, a more important thing to consider…Hear me out on this one.
Most women know at least one male human being. And they use sites like Pinterest to share things online with peers (some of them even friends, or family members) that are relevant to interests of friends – some of whom could be men? Regardless, no one buys your pitch in this ear – unless it’s been shared or recommended. Put a pin in that.
If you’re reading this and still don’t get it? Here are a few scary secrets that no one wants you to know about this social media crap…
- It’s currently the #1 ranking factor of SERPs (social signals, inbound links, Author Rank, etc.)
- Social Media is climbing the ranks of lead generation with more ways to collect user data than any other channel
- Those complaints you keep deleting off of your Facebook page? That’s called product feedback and free market research.
- Near your person is a smartphone, and unless it’s a CrackBerry, it’s dominated by social media
- If any of this is news to you…wait to you hear the secrets that them Duke Boys at Google haven’t told you about blogging (when they took you for $10MM on the latest Adwords-GDN-AdSense-TrueView integrated ad campaign)
The Internet is social. It always has been. And to some, it may be good advice to openly express that it can be used for something other than porn and politics.
Use the Interwebs to stay unFired…